David Beckham is the biggest metrosexual in the world simply for the fact that he loves himself. He loves being looked at and because so many men and women love to look at him too, it makes him the ultimate meterosexual. Some might even say the Godfather of Metrosexuality. He’s the future, but also a means of adapting other, less advanced men to that future. More to the point, he sucks Corporate cock with no gag reflex and that ain’t gay my friends. A staple of newspapers, men’s magazines, TV advertising and billboards, last year he earned around $8 million for sponsoring various male fashion accessories, such as Police sunglasses.

The Beckham advertising phenomenon, however, goes far beyond the usual cash-ins that are seen among most sporting stars. “Becks” gives the impression that he’d do it for nothing (except the attention); he’s a sporting star who wants to be a model and a model who just wants to be loved by all.